Do Not Resuscitate

At what point can you tell your doctor enough is enough! I don’t want to take ALL this medicine, and the doctor not get annoyed?

I know you can have DNR orders when you’re sick. People seem to understand that.

No one lives forever, and I’d prefer my golden years to be that and not one of poking and prodding to see if anything is wrong. My doctor seems to think I need all these diagnostic tests I don’t want to take. If it’s cancer, I probably wouldn’t have the treatment.

I’ve been badly injured by a doctor’s poor judgment and the less one pokes me, the happier I am.

Today I had to go see my doctor. I am glad to see her when I’m sick because she makes me feel better. Today was no exception, until she started in on my choice NOT to take a new medicine that I’ve read online can cause cardiovascular problems. Two doctors – one a vascular surgeon – said my circulation is good. My heart is strong, from what other doctors have said. I frequently have side effects from medicines. Why tempt fate?

My own mother died at age 52. She did everything the doctor told her to do and would fuss with me when I questioned him when he prescribed for me. Hey, he’s a man in a white coat with 15 minutes’ time with this body. I live in it 100% of the time. Yes, I’ll question a doctor if I don’t want that medicine because of possible side effects, or if I’m not as concerned as s/he is about certain things, and certainly because I’ve had to have surgery to correct a doctor’s mistake.

So . . . if you can say Do Not Resuscitate after a certain time, why is it so hard to hear, “I don’t want to take that medicine because of something I read about it?”

I guess they call me a “noncompliant” patient.

When I was pregnant with my last child, the doctor was so worried about my age (I was 39 three weeks after his birth) that she finally got me to sign a paper saying I would not sue her if he had any of the defects she kept wanting to check for that I refused the tests for. I believe that was the day I said I wanted him, no matter what! She asked what made me think I could handle a baby with defects, and I bit my tongue not to ask what made her think I couldn’t??? My mother had polio; my grandfather had one arm. I was raised around “handicapped” people. They are people with the same feelings (maybe more feelings) than others have.

When I was several weeks pregnant, I almost lost that baby. When the doctor came into the ER, she wanted to terminate. Uh . . . no. She said she didn’t think I realized how serious this was. I told her I knew exactly how serious this was, but if this child was terminated, it would be done by God, not by her. The condition eventually corrected itself and I went on to have a healthy baby boy. However, until that ER ultrasound, the pregnancy was thought to be several weeks less than it really was. One of the tests she wanted to run at 16 weeks had to be done in that certain window of time or it could give a false positive. With a positive, the next step was amniocentesis, which can cause a miscarriage. I believe it’s 15% of the time that it happens. So had I had THAT test, with the due date a month off, it could have caused another whole set of problems.

I am an intelligent human being. This is my body. I wonder at what age it is finally ok to say, “I’m taking these drugs, but not these,” and not have a doctor up in arms?

Years ago I refused another drug that I had read could cause cancer. That doctor also pooh-poohed my worry and said to just take the medicine. I did not. They now no longer prescribe that med because it can cause cancer. Duh!

This whole long blog is just, if I have the right not to be resuscitated, don’t I have the right to say NO to drugs I don’t want to take or diagnostic tests I don’t want to suffer through?

It’s my body. I appreciate the advice, I really do. I just don’t always agree with it.

I thought about lying, but what if, I end up in the hospital and the doctor thinks I’m taking drugs I’m not taking? Would she order them all administered? Or if she thinks I’m taking them and they aren’t working, will she switch me to something stronger?

I don’t lie. I hate liars. I just wish doctors would understand that I’m the captain of this body and it is not going to last forever. Nothing does. I’d like to enjoy it as long as I can without interference of side effects or the stress and pain of tests I don’t want to have.


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