Mothers

Mothers are depicted on TV as bothersome creatures whose mere existence torments their adult children.

Mothers are viewed as doddering old creatures out of touch with the reality of today’s society and having little use, except to be a nuisance.

One thing about mothers . . . once you’ve become an adult, your mother has lived long enough to study and be hurt by and to see dangers and delights in society that you haven’t discovered yet. They can save you some pain and trouble, and that’s what many mothers are tryinig to do.

If your mother says you work too long and too hard, chances are you do. Hard work and long hours are often regretted in subsequent years.

If your mother says you’re not eating right or not taking care of your health, teeth, body . . . you probably are guilty of those things as well.

Perhaps adult children resent their mothers because they realize there are still some things they don’t know. Or perhaps their mother’s views contradict the current beliefs of their peers and society?

Whatever the reason you may choose to shun your mother, remember this . . . IF your mother was supportive of you and cheered you on, if she tried (even though at times may have failed) to help you as you grew up . . . she still has your best interests at heart and only wants the best for you.

Calculate how many days? hours? minutes? you give to your mother each year . . . she’s keeping up with it. She may never say a word about feeling neglected, but her heart acknowledges it and she will become more reluctant to say or do anything for fear of causing you to spend less time with her.

If you love your mother, however distasteful the thought of spending time with her, you might want to do it anyway. “Time waits for no man”  (first appeared about 1395 in Chaucer’s Prologue to the Clerk’s Tale). It won’t wait until it’s a convenient time to spend time with your mother. If you’re waiting for her to change, chances are that’s not going to happen either. Take her or leave her while you can. I just hope you don’t regret your choice later.

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How Much Have You Given?

I dare anyone who is my age to stop and think about how much you have given.

Let it sink in.

Maybe you’re not like me and you haven’t given until you can’t give any more but still you found something else to give?

Did I mention I regret my generosity? Do you?

We have Code Orange Air Quality here today because of the NC wildfires that are raging many counties away.

I have two lung conditions. On a good day I’ve been told not to be without a rescue inhaler within arm’s length. That doctor actually prescribed five inhalers at once and said to put one in every room in my house. Keep one always within an arm’s length.

I laid down to take a nap day before yesterday. I didn’t use my CPAP machine (maybe I have 3 breathing issues?) because I was just taking a nap. I woke up not breathing and thought I was not going to be able to start myself back breathing. It is a terrifying experience and not the first time that it’s happened.

Yesterday I went in and out in the code orange air when my two dogs needed to go out. For some reason they have decided they are mortal enemies and I have to take them out separately, which means it takes twice as long.

I have three adult sons. Two are in the same state that I live in. One came by to borrow my car for a trip. Did he/she (now he’s decided he’s transgender), notice how hard it was for me to breathe? S/he did notice the house was warm. I’d been having chills all day. I had felt sick all day. I’d had touble breathing all day. S/he was preoccuppied with a problem at work, took my car and left.

I sent a message to my other son who lives in this state. He’s probably a couple hours away. I said I was having a very hard time taking my two dogs out. I mentioned the Code Orange air. I asked if he could come spend the weekend with me and help out. My sons know I don’t ask for help, unless I really need it. I prefer to do things myself.

I haven’t heard from that son. I know he saw the message because I got a message stating “Message seen at ___  o’clock”.

I wonder if those sons (daughter?) of mine have ever stopped to think how much I did for them? I bought things I couldn’t afford. I went places and did things when I had no energy. I sacrificed and spent my time trying to help them have better lives.

Now all I’m asking is help breathing during this weekend. Is that really too much?

Ok. I’ve given more than I should. I made a fool of myself over my kids. I never gave up.

I’ve even gotten an email from a friend asking how I’m feeling because her dad is having some problems breathing with this air. I told her exactly how I was feeling. No reply email. No phone call.

If I have to be cheerful and pleasant with no problems, but lots to GIVE to have a family and friends, guess what.

I’m DONE giving. Don’t even waste your breath asking. I’m DONE. I can live without family and friends. I can’t live without breathing. I guess I don’t matter that much to any of them. Not really.

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