I know how to multi-task. I also remember my grandmother telling me she could do one thing at a time.

I’ve watched people multi-tasking and they make so many mistakes that I call it “multi (something else, not tasking)”, but I won’t say the word here.

I think most people can do two things at the time, or even 3 or 4 things, but I do not think they are doing all of them well.

Perhaps my grandmother should have said she could only concentrate on one thing at a time. To get something as close to perfect as I can, I have to concentrate. Since I don’t like a mess or a lot of errors, I prefer to do one thing at a time.

There’s a reason you should not text and drive. Both require concentration. So do many of the multi-tasks I see people muddling through.

Is there joy in getting something exactly right any more? There is at my house. How do you even know how well you’ve done something if your mind was divided as you did many other things?

I was a telephone operator for two years a long time ago. We were taught to do several things at the same time. However, those things were all related and we practiced for six weeks before we even tried to do them without heavy supervision.

Juggling many tasks at once is something I don’t enjoy. I see young folks – many of them – rushing through their lives now, and I wonder how they will feel when they wake up at age 60? What will their lives look like to them? Blurs of multi-tasking without taking the time to enjoy things?

I don’t know. I just know my memories are not of doing several things at the time, but of the times I spent in the moment doing one thing and really getting it right.


Living May Be Over-Rated

I have never been able to fully interact with my “peers”. I don’t understand their ways of thinking or why they value what they value.

While on facebook this morning, I saw the quote about “everlasting life through Jesus Christ” . . .

I have read the posts about how wonderful it is to wake up every morning, no matter what your circumstances.

I’ve been told by a friend, who is a psychologist, that my worldly views are too close to the truth for most people and that’s why they get angry with me. ???

So is life to be lived with our heads in the sand while in denial of reality? What kind of life is that?

One of my greatest pleasures in life was teaching. I loved teaching, especially when I was able to teach a child everyone else had given up on. Now my health has pretty much ended that profession and I spend my time trying to decide if my dog has been out lately or if she is asking to go out. Sometimes I wonder what her qualify of life is. She’s 17 years old. She’ll be 18 in August. One day I wondered if I was confused when I was saying how long she’d lived . . . that maybe I’d mistakenly miscalculated. Dogs don’t live that long. But then I remembered (and I verified this by asking my son) that he was 12 years old when she was born. We had her mother. He is now 29 years old, almost 30. So yes, she is 17 years old and he’s had her over half his life. Except he’s in China and I have her.

That old dog and I take turns having bad days. Once in awhile we’ll both be having a bad day. When it’s her turn, I hover over her and try to help her up the steps. When it’s my turn, she stays close to my ankles and if I sit down, she’ll come lay her head on my knee.

I just don’t understand other people’s aversion to death. I mean, they act like it’s intolerable. Do they feel better than I do? Are they accomplishing more than me? What is the reason for their tenacity on life?

I have a very high IQ. One time I sat down and figured out that the span between my IQ and the “average” IQ is more than the span between the “average” IQ and the mentally deficient IQ.

“Mental deficiency used to be divided into the following sub-classifications, but these labels began to be abused by the public and are now largely obsolete: Borderline Deficiency (IQ 70-80), Moron (IQ 50-69), Imbecile (IQ 20-49) and Idiot (below 20). Mental deficiency is now generally called mentalretardation.”

This may be why I have so much trouble with relationships. I just don’t “get it”.

People refusing to acknowledge reality will not change reality. That’s a quote from me that you can use. I doubt that anyone ever will.

I was probably a better writer than I was a teacher, although I was a pretty good teacher.

I refused to use big words when small ones would do. I was often not appreciated by the teachers who teach exactly like the manual directs and who could not think outside the box. When you’re in the box, you cannot appreciate what is outside of it.

I tried to be approachable. I was non-threatening. If I had to threaten or appear threatening to teach a child . . . I had no interest in doing that.

I have a ceramic cup that I value. On it is written “Better than a thousand days of diligent study is one day with a great teacher”.  It’s credited as a Japanese Proverb.

I tried to be a great teacher.

Now I will try to be a great writer.

My main problem is that I have such a finesse in angering people with my statements of truth that I fear I might not build a large readership.

Well, I can only try. That’s what we all can only do. . . our best, and to try. For as my grandmother told me over and over when I was a child, “You don’t know what you can do until you try”.

I have another blog on WordPress called “Constance as a Writer”.

There’s a third blog titled “Ms. Playful” . . .

But even with all the things I’ve yet to write, I cannot fathom not going peacefully into that good night, when the time comes. I do not know what there is to rage against. Leaving this world cannot be that bad when all my energy has been spent.

Do not go gentle into that good night

Dylan Thomas1914 – 1953

Do not go gentle into that good night,
Old age should burn and rave at close of day;
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Though wise men at their end know dark is right,
Because their words had forked no lightning they
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Good men, the last wave by, crying how bright
Their frail deeds might have danced in a green bay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Wild men who caught and sang the sun in flight,
And learn, too late, they grieved it on its way,
Do not go gentle into that good night.

Grave men, near death, who see with blinding sight
Blind eyes could blaze like meteors and be gay,
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

And you, my father, there on the sad height,
Curse, bless, me now with your fierce tears, I pray.
Do not go gentle into that good night.
Rage, rage against the dying of the light.

Some Things I Have Learned This Week

If you go to a place where Senior Citizens gather, you will meet new friends. Those new friends will eventually introduce you to their friends in other places and you will have more peers to interact with than you know what to do!

Seniors are cheerful. When you go to a Senior Citizen event, there will be smiles and laughter.

Seniors cheer each other on. If you face a medical problem, you know who to ask for a referral to a good medical doctor. You know where to go to get certain services. You know how to handle certain situations at your age.  Everyone is pulling for everyone else to succeed at life and to enjoy it.

Senior Activities abound! What are you interested in? If you go to a Senior gathering, you will likely find something pertaining to that to participate in.

Seniors use the language you’re accustomed to. You know exactly what they mean when they use idioms  such as “My eyes were bigger than my stomach”. There is no explaining to have to do when you converse with another Senior.

If you’re a Senior Citizen now, or become one, get out there and make the rest of your life happen!



Seen It Before

I just read the headline of an article and immediately dismissed it as something I’ve read too many times before. It was about a “Stopgap Funding Averts Government Shutdown” or something like that.

That is the problem with life now. There’s not much I haven’t seen or heard before.

It takes a lot to get me to slow down and take a look or listen.

I am finding ways to amuse myself and learn new things, but it ain’t easy.

I’m teaching myself to play the piano on a musical keyboard I bought on sale in January.  I wanted it for Christmas, but got it much cheaper after Christmas. My cat enjoys it with me. I posted a video of her on it with me on my msplayful blog at wordpress. I think I’ll post it here.

Two years ago this cat, Hunter, almost died from heart failure. I remember the trips to the vet before and after work and all the medicine I gave her and all the love and attention. It resulted in her “coming out of” heart failure, which is something I had never seen before, and my vet said it was very rare, but he had seen it happen.

So in case you’re reading this and you’ve never seen a cat “play” the piano, here is the video. Around time 1:12 she begins hitting “chords” as I play and a little later (1:55 or 2:00?) I move and you can see her legs pounding on the keys.



Does It Matter?

I have been agitated by politics for a long, long time. I’m tired of the name calling and the suggestions that the election can be undone and how to keep President Trump from succeeding as a President.

I imagine myself in a store with threats of severe weather and wonder if I have time to get home before it hits?

I’ve never seen the world like it is today. People have gotten nasty with each other. They tweet and message and write all sorts of online things as if they are talking only to the machine they’re using. They don’t envision all the people out there who may read what they wrote.

I mentioned to my son last week that I wish I knew how much time I have left on this earth. There are things I still want to accomplish, but in order to prioritze them, I need to know how much time I have left.

I cannot continue to read things people post in the heat of the moment.

I just read one post on facebook that basically said if your opinion isn’t just like mine, it doesn’t deserve respect. Well, yes it does. If only to respect it enough to validate that’s what someone else thinks, and how I’d like to talk with them and see if I could get them to see the fallacies in their beliefs. And how I could listen to them to see any fallacies in mine.

I listened to a video on facebook last night. The woman has a very pleasant voice, and her message is worthwhile. I’m going to post that link on this blog post.

Time . . . I’m old and I don’t know how much I have left, but rather than wring my hands and look to see if the sky has fallen yet, I’m going to eschew political laments and try to do some kind of good before I leave. I’ve always tried to do good. I have not always succeeded, but I was trying to help the earth and my fellow man. (no, I’m not a man; I’m a woman . . . but it’s that kind of unimportant comments that will cause diversion from what I’m trying to say.) I cannot continue to allow my mind to be cluttered with other’s ignorance and rantings.

It is what it is. My time may be shorter than I think – or it may be longer. Whichever, I have a list of things I want to accomplish. Don’t post rantings or complaints, or anything else that will serve no purpose, but to try to upset me. I won’t be reading or thinking about them. Most are reworded expressions that I’ve read over and over for months.

Here’s the video that I listened to last night that still is affecting me this morning.

What I Leave Behind

You don’t get to my age without wondering how much time you have left on this earth and how much difference your having lived has made on the world. We all hear about famous people who have made great differences. We seldom hear about ordinary people who have made differences in the world, but only to a small extent. Still anything that improves a situation is something, and should be applauded.

I’ve spent eighteen years of my life teaching full time. This does not include the substitute teacher jobs I’ve held or the lessons I’ve taught my own children and perhaps a few others as I walked through this world.  Surely I touched someone somewhere whose life was changed, hopefully for the better, by knowing me.

I’ve spent hours and hours writing. I hope I’ve entertained, informed and persuaded. Those are the reasons we teach students that we write. We use the acronym PIE to help children remember these. Persuade Inform Entertain   . . .  I’ve been published in a few magazines explaining how to help cats birth kittens, how to find homes for kittens, how to use the Classroom Read Aloud, how to get students to write more when they write . . . I’ve had poems published . . . I’ve won an award for a short story. I’ve published various anecdotes on my blogs. At times I’ve tried to persuade, but I am not pushy and frankly you are responsible for your opinion, not me.

I think my greatest accomplishment are the children I leave behind that I myself birthed. I have three. They all started out as sons, although one is now transgendered into a daughter. I probably phrased that wrong, but it’s new to me and I’m still learning.

I hope as I walked through this world that I did some good somewhere.

I hope I’m not done yet. These final years, when I don’t race off to work or worry about helping my own children grow up, will probably be my most active as far as creating and influencing.

I have three blogs here at wordpress. Each one has a different focus. I have a teaching channel on youtube. It began as videos to help homeschooling parents. I’m a Reading Specialist and heard Reading is the hardest subject homeschooling parents teach. I thought I’d show them how I do it and hoped they might use some of my ideas. That has been harder than I thought it would be. I’ve learned how to edit videos, although I’m still not as good as my son at doing it. I’ve seen how many “takes” it can take to get something exactly right. The name of that channel is readingbymscorbett

I continue to write on books I started years ago. One, which I call my blindman book, I hope will one day change the way Child Protective Services works and that children will be less harmed by them than they are today.

There’s another “sister” book that goes with that one that lists different articles and stories I’ve collected over the years.

There’s a book about the break-up of my marriage that may be a memoir or may become a book “based on a true story”. Not sure.

There are poems I’ve written that I hope to share.

There’s flowers I hope to plant and vegetables I hope to grow.

I want to make my home more beautiful. Now I have time to think about what I want. Raising three sons alone will keep you too busy to focus on some other things.

I am done with my formal education. I have a Masters Degree. That’s as much as I want. I’ve taken many writing courses. I taught myself to knit using a book. I’m teaching myself to play the piano, although right now my cat plays about as well as I do. The musical keyboard I bought is a magnet to her and she runs to join in when I play. She knows how to turn on the drums, and I don’t. It’s her favorite part. She also clicks on some of the keys. Let me see if I can find that picture and end this blog with it. Some people on facebook thought it was amusing.




Seen Enough

I have seen enough in this lifetime to know that when the time comes to leave this world, I will not fight leaving it. It’s been a rough life with me feeling like I was usually going from fire to fire putting out flames. I did it for others. I did it for those I loved and cared about. Once in awhile, I did it for myself.

I was born to a woman who had been crippled by polio at age 3. When I was age 3, my mother decided she’d had all she wanted from my father and left him. Back then divorce wasn’t accepted like it is today. So I became the daughter with no father and a crippled mother. Truth be told, she was probably an alcoholic.

I went through school, got married to escape the hell of a home I grew up in, and then got surprised when my “wonderful” husband comforted a woman whose husband was over in Vietnam.  I got my own divorce.

Later I began dating a guy who had gone to college and hadn’t finished, but was taking a correspondence course to help him get back in. I studied the book with him and realized college wasn’t as hard as I’d assumed. I sent off my own application and request for financial aid and soon after found myself enrolled in college.

Things were rocky at times at that school and I left it glad to finally be out of there. It would take another year to find the job my degree prepared me for. I’d worked all four years of college at ECU News Bureau and met very nice people there who taught me what it felt like to have love and support.

Fast forward to five years later and I married the worst man in the world. I didn’t know it at the time because I was still learning as I went and didn’t recognize the red flags that became so apparent later when I was trying to leave him.

Out of that marriage came three children. I found myself alone raising them and trying to make ends meet and yet again, I faced problems and torments that were caused by a sister and niece I no longer speak to. Was my whole family evil? Was there any hope in this world? I’d look at the faces of my children and know there was and I’d keep on keeping on.

The kids grew up. They got education and degrees and began to make their ways into the world.

The world. That’s what this blog was to be about. When it first came to me in the kitchen, when I was fixing chicken and rice for my dogs, one of whom has been a little under the weather,  I realized that for the most part, I am done with this world. When the time comes to exit, I will not “rage against the dying light”, but will instead try to “go gentle into that good night” which is the opposite of what Dylan Thomas wrote in his poem “Do Not Go Gentle Into That Good Night”.

For any mental health professional s who reads this, I am neither suicidal nor homicidal, but simply understanding of what this life is like and when it’s time to check out, I’m ready to go. God will be choosing the time, but I will not fight it when he does.